Most Popular
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Boys Will Be Wetboys
It was fun while it lasted — but now MTV wants to mainstream Colorado's weirdest skateboarders.
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GB Fish & Chips
If at first you don’t succeed, fry, fry again.
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This Guardian Angel Bleeds Red
Sebastian Metz's heart is in the right place. If only his brain and body could follow.
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Rent-a-Cop
Denver's finest protect and serve, whether they're being paid by the city or the corner bar.
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Westfalen Hof
Good German food? You’re darn Teuton!
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Hideous Houses of Highland (9)
More is not merrier for Highland homeowners who want to stop construction in their neighborhoods.
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Rush to Riot (8)
How seriously should we take Rush Limbaugh's fantasies of a disturbance in Denver?
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Boys Will Be Wetboys (5)
It was fun while it lasted — but now MTV wants to mainstream Colorado's weirdest skateboarders.
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Grand Lux Cafe (4)
What happened in Vegas should have stayed there.
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Balls! (3)
What does Colorado taste like to you? Concrete? Or a big plate of Rocky Mountain oysters, dusted in daisies?
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Boys Will Be Wetboys
It was fun while it lasted — but now MTV wants to mainstream Colorado's weirdest skateboarders.
-
This Guardian Angel Bleeds Red
Sebastian Metz's heart is in the right place. If only his brain and body could follow.
-
Rent-a-Cop
Denver's finest protect and serve, whether they're being paid by the city or the corner bar.
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Rush to Riot
How seriously should we take Rush Limbaugh's fantasies of a disturbance in Denver?
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Hideous Houses of Highland
More is not merrier for Highland homeowners who want to stop construction in their neighborhoods.
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Five Worst Belated Mother's Day Gifts
04:58PM 05/13/08 -
Best New TV Theme Songs
04:00PM 05/13/08 -
A Really Raw Deal
03:33PM 05/13/08 -
Crocs' Big Idea: Upscale Shopping in Downscale Shoes
05:10PM 05/13/08 -
The Last Gasp
05:33PM 05/13/08
What we are writing about
- Barack Obama
- Brad Pitt
- Charlie Huang
- Cherry Creek
- Colorado Rockies
- David Lane
- Denver Art Museum
- DeVotchKa
- dogs
- Fisher Clark Urban...
- Glenn Morris
- hi-dive
- Hillary Clinton
- Jason Sheehan
- Knocked Up
- Larimer Lounge
- Lupe Fiasco
- Mark Travis
- My Kid Could Paint That
- Nathan & Stephen
- No Country for Old Men
- PlayStation
- Radiohead
- Seth Rogen
- There Will Be Blood
- Various Artists
- Vinyl
- Wii
- William Havu Gallery
- Xbox
Recent Articles By Patricia Calhoun
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The Colfax Marathon Goes Off-Course
Why is this race skipping the best stretch of this street?
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Street Dreams
Sowing creative seeds at the Botanic Gardens.
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Curiouser and Curiouser
The Denver Project captures the rhythms of the street.
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Making Raves
Get excited about the first Denver Food Rave.
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Balls!
What does Colorado taste like to you? Concrete? Or a big plate of Rocky Mountain oysters, dusted in daisies?
National Features
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The Pitch
We (Heart) Matt
The Shawnee Mission East class of '08 loves its gay homecoming king.
By Jen Chen -
Broward-Palm Beach New Times
Things That Go Bump on the Flight
Something went horribly wrong on American Airlines Flight 48--and we've got the pictures to prove it.
By Ed Newton -
Seattle Weekly
Being Gary Busey
Everybody thinks Jeff Swanson is somebody famous. And he does nothing to dissuade them of the notion.
By Aimee Curl -
Cleveland Scene
The Artful Dodger
Women loved Zachary Coleman. And he loved their money.
By Lisa Rab
Can We Talk?
The latest from the Colorado Tourism Office leaves us speechless.
By Patricia Calhoun
Published: May 8, 2008
Last month, the Colorado Tourism Office offered a taste of this state to New Yorkers in the form of "Colorado High Altitude Concrete," made by the distinctly un-Coloradan Danny Meyer ("Balls!," April 24). Anyone hungry for more was referred to a website that touts our fine cuisine of rattler cakes and Rocky Mountain oysters, and serves up enough spelling mistakes to make us look like a state already filled with illiterate peasants.
This month, the CTO placed a full-page "Let's Talk Colorado" promo in Food & Wine magazine, which sells those ads for $74,500 ($65,000 with a twelve-time contract). "Let's talk road trips," reads the copy. "Let's talk breathtaking. Let's talk Colorado." But in this magazine whose readers are rendered speechless by a perfect soufflé, let's not talk about food. At all.
Apparently no magazine is safe from this babble. The state also bought a two-page "Let's Talk Colorado" spread in the April 21 New Yorker, whose readers might appreciate the nice picture of Red Rocks under the words "Sometimes you want to hear yourself think. Sometimes you don't." But the CTO definitely doesn't want to hear what I think about the embarrassment on the opposite page — "Dude Interlude," a fake story/ad about an imaginary trip to the Cater-2U Dude Ranch in Colorado:
A long lean man with big-sky blue eyes, a leathery face, and a square jaw was comfortable under his worn Stetson, and extended a hand. I was sure his name had to be Tex.
"Howdy, friend," he drawled. "Ah'm Col."
"Oh...hi, Cal," I said.
"Col," he repeated softly. Like in Col-orado. Cal would be my brother. In Cal-ifornia."
Where we should send this entire campaign.
