Road Trip

We drove an old faux-wood-paneled station wagon packed with six of us plus backpacks, tents and coolers. All for a music festival at the tip-top of Maine. Ironically, the craziest event on that trip had nothing to do with music, cramped quarters, camping, lighthouses or stopping for lobster rolls at McDonald's. No, no. Strung out on coffee, ginseng and pep pills, I wandered into a rest-stop bathroom, washed my face, smiled at the women next to me, dried my hands under the blower, then met the scared gaze of a little girl peeking from behind her mother's legs. Shit. "Oh, God, I'm in the women’s room," I said aloud. That's when the little girl started to scream.

Everyone has a bad road-trip story. I have a million. Like driving home one Christmas with antifreeze leaking on my feet, no heat, snow outside and the windows cracked to avoid suffocating from the fumes. Come share your story tonight at Buntport Theater, 717 Lipan Street, during Teacher's Pet: Vacation "all I ever wanted" (Road trip disasters). "It's like a twisted show-and-tell," says Buntport member Hannah Duggan. "We have a projector, and I know some people will bring pictures, read from diaries, sing songs, and some will even do performance-arty things where they reenact situations."

A prize is awarded for the "teacher's pet." Doors open at 8 p.m., and there are a limited number of five-minute slots, so sign up early. Tickets are $4, $5 or $6; for details, call 720-946-1388 or go to www.buntport.com.
Mon., April 21, 9 p.m., 2008